February 22nd is officially Lady Porn Day, a day about exploring porn and masturbation. Because It’s tough trying to explore porn as a girl. There just isn’t much lady-friendly stag.
Girls aren’t encouraged to talk to each other about porn– the same way we aren’t encouraged to talk to each other about masturbation. In girl-world, too often we expect our first orgasm to come from a partner. Then we expect our Sex-and-The-City approved hitachi-orgasms to come from, well, our closed eyes. But porn is just another tool for your sexual growth. And according to statistics more women are watching porn than ever, growing stronger in our silence apparently.
Rabbit Write is curating Lady Porn Day as a blogosphere wide project. I’ll be writing about lady porn the entire week of the 21st-26th. So join in (at any point) to share your porn stories, insights or favorite porn links.
At it’s heart, this is about celebrating pornography and masturbation. It is an opportunity for ladies of all genders (or however you identify) to open up a dialog: What is feminist porn? What is your history with porn? What do you find hot?
And ultimately it’s a dare to share your hot links. Because the more we can openly talk about porn and what we like, the more likely it is that porn for women will continue being made. And really guys have been sharing and recommending porn for ages! So help a sister out.
I dare you to start the conversation, ask your friends: “hey what do you think about porn–and what sites can you recommend?” The point is to get women across the globe talking and thinking about porn and masturbation in a healthy and fruitful way.
These are the Official Articles I posted for Lady Porn Day
- Lady Porn Day: Get On Board
- Mini Porn Interview | Buck Angel
- Lady Porn Day Video Chats Part 1
- Guest Post: You Can Put Your Clothes on Now by Aubrey of Vagina Drum
- Mini Porn Interview | Jiz Lee
- Porn Secret Round-up
Lady Porn Day Stars
Bloggers I personally invited to be a part of this project
- Our Favorite Porn for Lady Porn Day by Dodson and Ross
Betty Dodson is a living legend who brought female masturbation to the forefront when NO ONE was talking about it. Carlin Ross is a one woman show herself, the sex positive entrepreneur started with a background in law then set the internet aflame as a sexpert. Through the two’s frank discourse about sexual pleasure, they have helped countless people enjoy intimate relationships, discover their sexuality, and understand their bodies–fixing the world, one orgasm at a time! Dodson and Ross is an incredibly detailed and dynamic reference that includes tactful and compassionate answers to almost any question about sex or the body you can ask!
- Why Can’t We Talk About Porn by Rachel Hills
Rachel Hills is the Internet’s favorite feminist journalist. She writes for glossies (often “ladymags’) and has written over 150 big thinking pieces. But her blog, Musings of an Inappropriate Woman (perhaps the only time I will ever fully approve of a blog title starting with “Musings of..”) is what keeps us coming back. She writes about gender and sexuality in a way that is approachable while still being super smart and thought inciting. Add this one to your reader to get delicious bites on what is going on in the world of feminism and girl culture.
- Big Girls Don’t Bang by Kelly Diels
Kelly’s Blog: Cleavage, will teach you how to live passionately and fully. She writes eloquently about sex, money and life direction with soul and a sense of humour. Her blog is real. The kind that can make you cry and feel at home, she writes with such honesty AND does it all dancing in glittery red shoes–entertaining the reader at every step of the way. Mark her as a must-read.
- Lady Porn Day: Self-Exploration Through Porn by Kait Strong
Kait is, as she says, one part geek, one part glamazon, and one part spaz, and her blog details her everyday adventures, her insights into sex and culture, and her reflections about herself in a way that make you want to cheer her on. This smart lady is equally knowledgeable about feminism and Star Wars, and her efforts to take charge of her life and love herself make you hope that she is successful at the end of the day.
- Lady Porn Day by Slutever
Karley is kinda like the coolest girl on the internet, and one of the only people who can really pull off bringing punk rock to sex writing. Her prose is fucking delicious and addicting, and her photography is stunning. I have to say that Karley has succeeded at making us think her life is exciting, mostly because it is. Seriously, the girl has squatted in London. And makes it chic.
- Jilling Off by Ev’Yan
On Women & Pornography by Ev’Yan
Ev’Yan Nasman’s blog is for the bold at heart. And Ev’Yan’s heart shows through her in her writing, at once strong in self while staying vulnerable. She is a gorgeous writer and…a gorgeous lady. She is smart, savvy, stylish and knows how to wield a sentence. I am always impressed at the entire worlds Ev’Yan builds inside 500-word blog posts. Ev’Yan is thoughtful and fearless when it comes to sex and relationships and insight offers a lot we can all learn from.
- Lady Porn Day: Discussion by The Demoiselles
What a Normal Vagina Looks Like by The Demoiselles
Jennifer Nichole and Lindsay are writers and a world-changers. The two champion body-love and explore accessible fashion for all shapes and sizes. Lindsay is a fearless fashion adventuress and Jennifer promotes awareness about the clothing we use and consume in an effort to encourage people to make choices that are truly in life with their beliefs. These girls are changing the way we think about fashion and clothes and our bodies, and doing something truly unique in the process.
- Lady Porn Day: Pre-Game Commentary by Miss Maggie Mayhem
Miss Maggie Mayhem is one of the most outspoken supporters of porn (in all its forms) and has used her career as a porn star and performer to advocate for social and sexual equality between the sheets and otherwise. This wickedly pro-porn champion of social justice is truly the thinking woman’s pin-up girl and proves once and for all that smart IS hot.
- Ladies, Let’s Talk About Porn by Mom in Real Life
A blog that is ultimately a study in contradictions, Rachel gives us raw insight into the joys, humiliations, and perils of motherhood. She proves that women can have babies without utterly destroying their sex life and that mindless consumption of Spongebob reruns is not necessarily part and parcel of mommy-hood. If you’re looking for a mommy blogger who doesn’t suck, you need to look no farther.
- Lady Porn Day! by The Beautiful Kind
Kendra Holliday has created a venue where people of all orientations, interests, and histories can ask questions, receive advice, and communicate about sex and relationships–a truly sex-positive community. Kendra is a beautiful writer with an even more beautiful heart and through her work she hopes love and banishes shame. Her website is quickly becoming the go-to-source for sex on the Internet.
- Lady Porn Day: Observations by Alle Malice
Alle is truly a larger-than-life persona. Her blog provides hilarious advice aimed at navigating life and relationships, both online and in the real world, an offers insight into her struggles with growing up and becoming who she is meant to be, something we can all learn from. Her excellent prose, amusing anecdotes, and Star Trek fandom make Alle someone everyone should be friends with.
- Lady Porn Day is Feb 22nd by Jiz Lee
This genderqueer pornstar is changing the game of porn and at the same time uses their involvement in sex work as a window to social activism. Along with championing equal gender agency in pornography, Jiz works to start conversations about traditional gender in a way that challenges conventional thinking and creates space for those who do not fit the binary mold. Plus Jiz is a stone cold fox. Consider Jiz Lee your new porn crush. Or mine.
- On Trying to Make My Own Porn by Tiara the Merch Girl
This woman is an entertainer in every aspect of the word. Defined by her unique creative flair, her projects are focused on bringing her story to the world to help women of all types, everywhere. Her positive outlook, sex-positivity, and introspection are an inspiration to all, and we wish her luck in achieving her goal of spreading her message to San Fran!
- A Glimpse of Ankle: The Lady Porn Day Edition by Hersteria
This ain’t your mother’s sex and marriage advice — it’s your grandmother’s (literally). Hersteria posts excerpts of seriously outdated reference books on love and sexuality and while it’s amusing to see how much things have changed, it’s the things that HAVEN’T changed that gives this tongue-in-cheek exploration of American sexuality through the ages its teeth. Plus, monthly hussies. Seriously.
- asking questions about porn, the internet, and new webcam-perspective by Jellybones
Leslie is a college student at UCLA and her blog is an exciting mix of fashion, design, and everyday curiosities. This media design major’s daily outfits mix high fashion into her everyday wardrobe in a way that is accessible to even the most fashion confused. She often lets her pictures speak for themselves, which results in a story-book-like chronicle of her life. This girl isn’t afraid to tackle a touchy topic just as fearlessly as the tackles the world of fashion.
- Lady Porn Day, Sadie’s Porn Way. Confession #552 by Sadie Smythe
THE non-monogamist to know courageously challenges societal norms of marriage by detailing her solution to the “problem” of monogamy. This chronicle of her experience with an open relationship is riveting (and hella juicy!) and her posts challenge our own beliefs about relationships and intimacy. Sadie also has an ebook coming out April 1, with some very sexy excerpts currently posted on her blog!
- LaPD: Lady Porn Day by JamYe WaXman
JaYme WaXman’s blog is a great resource for those burning questions about the finer points of sex. She also has a ton of information available in the form of books and videos and starts conversations about human relationships and sexuality in workshops all over the country. JaYme is also passionate about reimagining porn and creates her own woman-friendly (and educational) erotica.
- Happy Lady Porn Day! by Wilhelmina Wang
I think the entire Internet has a crush on Wilhelmina, and she certainly deserves it. Besides writing some sizzling erotica, Wilhemina’s thoughtful analysis of trending sexual issues, sex toy reviews, and frank conversations about sex in real life make her site a great resource for those in the thick of figuring things out for themselves. This woman keeps her mind in the gutter, and we love her for it.
- On Banging and Body Image by Medical Marzipan
Medicinal Marzipan is THE body-loving blogger as far as I am concerned, and through her blog she has created a safe place to explore self for women of all ages. She also provides a font of information, including learning to eat in a way that jives with you, setting sexual boundaries, and learning to cultivate unconditional self-love. More than anything, Marzipan wants to help you love yourself just the way you are, and her blog is an incredible inspiration and guide on that path to self-acceptance.
- Ladies First! by Hipster Musings
Hipster Musings is the showcase of Isabel’s wickedly understated (and totally rad) fashion, her excellent music commentary, and her keen reflections on feminism and culture, Canadian and otherwise. Refreshingly authentic and completely herself, her generally exceptional taste makes her completely deserving of the total blogger crush that I have on her right now.
- Happy Lady Porn Day! by Em and Lo
If you’re looking for advice you can use in the bedroom tonight, this website is a great place to visit. Their lighthearted tongue-in-cheek presentation of material you can use, combined with their sexually diverse panelist’s opinions on many different issues makes this an informative and entertaining resource for sex, love, and everything in between.
- BDSM Can Be “Love Sex” Too by Clarisse Thorn
Clarisse Thorn is a feminist and a radical pro-BDSM, sex-positive activist located in–my city– Chicago. Clarisse works tirelessly to expand our conversations about sex of all kinds–kinky or vanilla–and helps others along their path to acceptance and understanding for ALL consentual sex. While she is a crucial player in the effort to destigmatize BDSM, she is also a huge advocate for all, and she believes good sex is something everybody deserves. Clarisse is a powerhouse and always an inspiration.
- Adventures in Pornland by Quizzical Pussy
A snarky sex blog for those who are curious (or, one may say, quizzical) about the finer points of sex and womanhood. This blog is unapologetically honest and refreshingly blunt, yet still never fails to see the humor in life, even in the dark times. Quizzical Pussy’s ability to throw it all out there just like it is and her determination to leave no stone uncovered on her path to understanding herself and her sexuality result in a charming and quirky read.
- Lady Porn Day by Fashion Pirates
Arabelle has brought together fashion and feminism in a refreshing way that no one else has done before. If there is a fourth wave of feminism, she is riding the crest and looking fabulous while doing it. Arabelle is completely okay with herself in a way that I envy, and her blog is campy and fun, and often serves as a vision board for her unique aesthetic.
- Some Thoughts on Ladypornday by Carol Queen
This living legend is an accomplished sex educator who calls herself a “sexological overachiever” for good reason. At its core, her work analyzes the role of sex in culture, and through her ongoing conversation with the world she hopes to help us to understand our unique sexual makeup and empower us to act on it.
- Lady Porn Day: PORN! by Blue-Eyed Vixen
Blue Eyed Vixen is a sex blogger in the classic sense. She’s a blogger writing about sex and the sex she is having. But she is also a mom, a wife, a lover…and a self described MILF with neurosis. She is confident, flirtatious, open and honest and this is what shines through in her writing. It’s no wonder she ranked high as a top 100 sex blogger this year. She’s got the confidence and is building the community to keep climbing.
- Spit Dripping and Bleached Assholes by Alexis Belon
Alexis is a philosopher, poet and a budding photographer–proof that ladies can do it all plus she’s almost depressingly young. She has an ability to give voice to the thoughts that reside in the darker parts of her mind in a way that makes you consider your own fears a little more closely. Her blog gives readers a glimpse into the mind of a woman who knows who she is, what she wants, and is working at getting it.
- A Short History of Watching Porn by Saskia Vogel
Saskia Vogel is a writer and editor who showcases her brainy insight into gender politics, Los Angeles, and sexuality on her blog. Saskia is a great resource for commentary on sex in society and the media, but there is also a charming cadence to her writing that makes her blog a pleasure to consume, no matter what the topic.
Jilling Off Hall of Fame
The best lady-approved porn we can find. These were submitted through #ladypornday if you think you’ve got a link to rival these, share it!
- The Hall of Fame has moved to it’s own page.
Thanks for everyone’s support and contributions.
- Make Love Not Porn
One of the coolest things Cindy has done is put together the awesome website Make Love, Not Porn, which compares “real life” to “porn life” by contrasting what people see in most porn with what real people want to experience in the bedroom. While her website serves to inspire healthy conversations about sexual preferences, the fact that she also explores the way porn has influenced our human behavior though technology is pretty interesting, too.
- Violet Blue
Where do you even begin? Violet is perhaps the most widely known and respected sex writer in mainstream America and even Oprah loves her! Beyond being an expert on sex and technology, a prolific author, and a great resource for information about the how-to of sex, this woman practically invented the term sex journalism and has really paved the way for the rest of us.
- Already Pretty
- Early To Bed
Early 2 Bed is a Chicago-based retail store with internet storefront and blog. This store is designed to be woman-friendly, diversity-friendly, and welcoming to all sexual interests and experience levels while providing a level of customer service not easily found in the sex toy realm. This radical feminist sex shop sponsors community outreach and educational sessions and tries to be a resource for all to learn about themselves and their sexuality, in no small part by providing sex tips galore and great resources about exploring sexuality on their website. It’s where I buy the things that get me off Also check out their fabulous Lady Porn Day Givaway!
- It’s Ladyporn Day! by Charlie Glickman at Good Vibrations
- Lady Porn Day on Crash Series Blog!
- Trve West Coast Fiction
- Beauty Schooled
As seen on:
- The Young Turks
- Ms. Magazine
- Laughing Squid
- Savage Love
- Time Out Chicago
- The Gloss
- The Hairpin
The fantastic official Lady Porn Day banners. All images found via Tumblr.